Monday, May 18, 2009

HOME ALONE

I am sitting at home by myself until Nehya's business trip is over. I never thought I would be able to say that my Bat(daughter) is going on a business trip. I am excited for her.

She is up for another promotion at her job and if she get's get she is going to be moving sooner than I thought. She is growing up more everyday. Anywhere that she goes is still going to be a great vacation spot for me when I want to get away from it all.

My only problem is that she is going to be more than a couple hours away this time. She is my baby and she is becoming a woman. Getting ready for marriage and everything. What did I do to deserve such a great Bat?

I am going to sit here and pull out some old family albums and just have a great time remembering my family. Nehya said I am only allowed to blog once a week. so I guess this is my one time. She will not know unless she comes home later this week, who knows, maybe I will blog once more if not twice.

Tefilat HaDerech This is a prayer for traveling. This is for My Dear Bat

Y'hi ratzon milfanekha A-donai E-loheinu ve-lohei avoteinu she-tolikhenu l'shalom v'tatz'idenu l'shalom v'tadrikhenu l'shalom, v'tagi'enu limhoz heftzenu l'hayim ul-simha ul-shalom. V'tatzilenu mi-kaf kol oyev v'orev v'listim v'hayot ra'ot ba-derekh, u-mi-kol minei pur'aniyot ha-mitrag'shot la-vo la-olam. V'tishlah b'rakha b'khol ma'a'se yadeinu v'tit'nenu l'hen ul-hesed ul-rahamim b'einekha uv-einei khol ro'einu. V'tishma kol tahanuneinu ki E-l sho'me'a t'fila v'tahanun ata. Barukh ata A-donai sho'me'a t'fila.

May it be Your will, L-rd, our G-d and the G-d of our ancestors, that You lead us toward peace, guide our footsteps toward peace, and make us reach our desired destination for life, gladness, and peace. May You rescue us from the hand of every foe, ambush along the way, and from all manner of punishments that assemble to come to earth. May You send blessing in our handiwork, and grant us grace, kindness, and mercy in Your eyes and in the eyes of all who see us. May You hear the sound of our humble request because You are G-d Who hears prayer requests. Blessed are You, Adonai, Who hears prayer.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Smile For Me Baby Girl

She laughed at his dry jokes, when no one else would. She cried when he cried, and still is crying, and laughs when needed.

To catch a smile on her face right now is very hard to do, but I know it's there.

I sit and wonder if she will ever show me that genuine smile, where I get to see every tooth in her mouth.

Will she sleep long enough to get the proper rest her body needs?

Will she be found again, in the land she is lost in?

Will she ever look at me with those Big blue energetic eyes she once looked at him with?

Will she ever love again, the way she loved him?

Will she stay or continue to run away?

A lot of questions a mother wants to know the answers too. The only one that really matters is, WILL YOU SMILE FOR ME BABY GIRL?

To My Bat With Ahavah,

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

The Charm(ed) Bracelet



I have been up in the attic for the past couple of days, cleaning up and getting rid of things that we are never going to use. I found a certain someone's Charm Bracelet, my youngest daughter's to be exact.

Growing up she had a very overactive imagination and she would always say that her charms had a special power. One day, she lost the bracelet she went crying to her father about it and he went out and bought her another one and they kept it a secret. That is what they thought they did, her first charm was an "H" and it was not like the one I had bought for her. She had a much more expensive bracelet and Charm.







A couple months later I went out to buy a new charm for her birthday, she wanted a Star Of David. I brought it home and it would not fit. I did some investigating and I put it on mine and my other daughter's and it fit perfectly, that is when she let me know what had happened and said "please don't put daddy on punishment or be mad at him, It was my fault" she was more worried about her father than lying to me about the bracelet. I exchanged the charm to a bigger size. I learned to forget about it and just understand it hurt her that she was not able to come to me and let me know she "misplaced it"







I was going to go out and buy a new bracelet for her, she is old enough to care for it now, maybe she will treat it like she treats her shoes and value it. Mr. K never knew that she lost the bracelet that he had replaced the other one with.

He and I went shopping while on vacation last summer he found her the same charm that he had given to her sister when she got married almost 5 years ago. He bought it because he did not know if it was going to still be made when she decided to get married (She tells me NEVER). I look for the day I can place this on her charm bracelet and let her know it is from her father. She told me I should give it to her now, that she could take it everywhere she goes and think of him being there.

I will keep it for that special day when she finally makes it under the Chupah*


*Chupah symbolizes the marital home, open on all sides for guests.

Mrs. K

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Mother's Day

A joyous occasion that every mother loves to share and be surrounded by her kids. Today it marked the day that my husband passed away. So many overwhelming thoughts entered my mind today.

One of my daughters, let me know that she loved me first thing this morning and wished me A Happy Mother's Day. I hugged her to let her know that I am here for her but the reality is, she has been here for me. She is the one that is wiping my tears.

We walked hand in hand into worship today and as I looked at her I seen her dad. The smile, the way she carries herself and her strength.

I have two beautiful daughters that G-d has blessed me with. I thank him everyday for them. We all have our ups and our downs, I am not the perfect mother and nor do I claim to be. I am going to make mistakes, I am going to do somethings that I am going to regret. I regret a lot already but I never miss a chance to let them know I love and I treasure them. Kirsten and Nehya, you two gorgeous Young Ladies are why Mother's Day is so special to me.

I love You Both.

Mom